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11th to 11th -- Without Ictus, Within Throe
(A Prose Poem With Note for Ann Marie Almeida)


Something deep, hidden, and empty has found me and taken me to its silence
and solitude

If it is God, I'll be fine. I'll drift up after a disconsolate and darkened
desperation humbled but with enough light to see

If it is not-God, there will be nothing there to hold me, and I'll re-emerge
some unforeseen dawn as naturally as morning mostly does

Still, for now, I'm in the throe

(wfh, 11Sept-11Oct 2001)

      ic-tus, according to Wordsmyth, is
            1.  a metrical or rhythmical stress, as in poetry.
            2.  in medicine, a sudden pathological attack, such as a stroke or epileptic seizure)

      throe, is
            1. a deep, wrenching pain or sudden spasm, as in death or childbirth.
            2. (usu. pl.) any convulsive or anguished struggle, or great exertion:
                in the throes of combat; the throes of moving to a new house



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